Your calm and my calm
Mother, I am only looking for your calm, your longed for peace that at the same time is my calm. That calm that rests in clear springs, of fine winter landscapes. That calm that crosses the threshold of death. That calm that is heard, in the middle of a cold and clear night. Clear and innocent, that calm that extinguishes the flame of resentment and anger. Sweet warm haven of peace and calm!
When your heart beats fatigued and coldly exhausted, I wake up screaming, instantly, between tears and tears. They are huge sobs of a passionate life. Life tattooed on my dark skin, with embers and coals of fatuous fires. Life, seed of the forbidden fruit of a passionate and captive love.
You miss the sweet taste of rosemary honey in the cold early mornings, where winged steeds ride through soft wet meadows. Wet with the fine drops of the cold morning dew. And your ego and alter ego struggle in that eternal wait, as the days go by in eternal silence.
Blunders and sad delusions! Your memory falsify silver mirages. Molten silver, in old sacred Tibetan wooden bowls.
Empty the heavy backpack that carries your passionate soul of caged princess. Internal Atman, essence covered with djellabas and sacred black robes. Black tunics, slightly velvety with sweet flashes of iridescent stars.
Sweet wait for an iridescent star! Sweet wait for white and ethereal butterfly! Butterfly of infinite wings of solidarity. Wings that unfold towards the snowy mountains, under the blue skies of Asia. But you, mother, adored and beloved seek refuge among white clouds of cotton, between the branches of a tree that reaches the celestial roofs.
Nobody can take away that sweet look of innocent girl, that bright look of humility and eternal courage. Mother, you will always be my beloved princess! Mother, you will always be the wild diamond, in my brightest heart! You will always be the polar star that guides my slow walk, in this gloomy forest, in this deserted and wild jungle! Mother, star of the seas, paint that cloudy sky of your days with immaculate stars. The guardian of the garden of Eden cares and caresses your beautiful soul with words full of passion.
The Supreme Being soothes, like a gentle breeze, the fire of your mortal wounds. You thought you were immortal, but you also live the passage of time in the sweet conscious eternity. Time that leaves traces tattooed on your face tired and serene. Face relief of breeze and fire …
Mother, star of the seas, I feel joy overflowing with the immensity of your ineffable love. Burning love of Essene hearts, under the indomitable winds of your beloved Judean desert. Love of red passion, of sacred fire, sincere love between rebels of suns, between waking seas.
Get away from the fierce lions of the desert! His claws lurk and trap your sincere heart torn and battered. I, mother, forgive and forget your indifference towards you. They do not deserve a reply, it is true and you know it. Forget their hurtful words that hurt your luminescent essence. Remember only the sublime moments under the sacred neem trees. Remember those calm and peaceful sunsets in the Kashmir valley. Dream of the dance of the moon, in the immaculate skies under the infinite light of Ladakh. Remember, eternally, the burning fire of the fire of your love in Srinagar. Memories of sweet dreams, dreams of Essene hearts in the ineffable awakening to light, in the awakening to the supreme universal consciousness.
After so much time in the tremendous darkness, today I finally see white light on my horizon; assid amllal …
You never thought that you helped me to mature, to learn from my own mistakes and from my immense defects. Mother, I thank you, today and forever. Today I know that I can fly free to my dreams and that these become reality.
At last I feel in my fiery blood to run the supreme freedom. Freedom of the children of the infinite conscious light. Freedom of the Essene people in the awakening towards a new existential reality. The awakening of the people to a new initiatory thought, in Jaram.
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